It's so official! :)

I love you!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for the wonderful 3 days with you... :)

Hopefully it'll be forever! :) Have faith, schat.... have faith.. :)

At Last by Etta James

At last, my love has come along
My lonely days are over
And life is like a song
Oh, yeah, at last
The skies above are blue
My heart was wrapped up in clovers
The night I looked at you
I found a dream that I could speak to
A dream that I can call my own
I found a thrill to rest my cheek to
A thrill that I have never known
Oh, yeah when you smile, you smile
Oh, and then the spell was cast
And here we are in heaven
For you are mine
At last

Thank You for the dance last nite, love.... with 'At Last' - Beyonce @ Cadillac Records.... Unforgattable indeed....

Let's hope for the future... I love you...

other monologues of mine...

Saya (S): hey....

Hati (H) & Pikiran (P): Haaaaaiiiii!!!!!

S: apa kabar?

P: kamu yang apa kabar?

H: sedang terjebak lagi yah?

S: ahahahahahahahaaaaa

P: kemarin ini tindakanmu gila! stupid!

H: Tapi aku berhasil menahanmu bukan?

P: Kamu kurang memanggilnya!

H: Hey! Jangan salahkan saya donk.... Saya sudah berusaha memanggilnya..... dari awal!

S: hey hentikan! Saatnya bersama lagi ini...

P: Bagaimana?

Wanderer....part 1(?)

S0, yesterday finally I went to the doctor, to check on something, something which is very disturbing. I went to meet a friend whom is a also the doctor. Well, one of the reasons was also because I wanted to meet her children. I miss them a lot! Especially Mikiting! She's so adorable and active.

My friend, the doctor, gave me some prescription, she said also, in two week time if there was no more pain or whatsoever, it means, I don't need to undergo the knife... Let's pray! Keq3x....

Oh yeah, let's talk about conquering Jakarta. Who says Jakarta is a nice city? Keq3x... jakarta is a hard and cold city! You have to be strong or even stronger than your surrounding, especially about working in Jakarta. Many bad things happen in Jakarta like in big cities around the world regarding to have good position at work. You name it, from salary, environment, friends, and all you want to is becoming the part of the elites in Jakarta. People that have access to and for everything. Trust me, if you were a person who is crazy and craving for networking, you definitely have that kind of ambition deep down. Take a good look at yourself in front of the mirror and tell me that isn't true. :P because I was like that... Yes... I was like that... and it's hard.. The lifestyle is so expensive and at some point I feel bored and tired, and I'm not even working yet! Thank you God for showing me those kind of life earlier.... :P Yeah, turns out, I don't like it... Ahak3!!!!

Another Journey

28.. touched down!
Yeah, I just turned 28, and it felt... weird... ahak3!!! Not about in 2 years I'll be 30, but all the worries and bad things weren't there. :) I feel happy :)

What did I do, I enjoyed my day by having lunch and amost dinner at my gradmom's place in Cinere, with the uncles and aunties (minus the one in Surabaya and all.. I mean all cousins!)

What is it about 28? At least I dont have to worry I'll be joining the 27 clubs.. ahak3!! You know what I meant... Kurt Cobain, Janis Joplin, ppl who died at the age of 27.. but I want to be like Soekarno, who started something at the age of 27!! yeah!!! :P I did though, slowly but sure! :) I just need more booster and big faith in Him! His plans are the best for me.. :)

So....

'Love makes you dependent or incredibly more confident in what you do'

'Stuck in this country, either you get less stupid or you break all the norms and be grand'

'Stay inside the box or you get the hell outta here'

'3 weeks... is all you've got... before summer'

choices.......

ends with

'you're too smart just to be like this.....'

Being me..

There are reasons in every actions that I take... Yes, I'm doing something because of something something... There's a reason why I become what I am now... I'm not ignorant, I'm just trying to laid back... easy person and calm... I'm trying to get things done not with anger and hatred, just a fun feeling and finally resulting a win win solution.....

Whenever I feel sad, anger and hatred, those feelings made me down.... I have this tendency to feel depression, and I don't want it... Bipolar Disorder.... Though I haven't been diagnosed as a bipolar, but yes, I have the tendency to become one. I don't want it, I don't want to live as a loner girl..... I don't want to take pills... I don't want to have to meet a shrink once a week or once a month... It's hard you know, to have control to those negative thoughts and feelings...

Mengenai Berbagi

Berbagi dalam hidup... Itu mungkin salah satu alasan juga kenapa manusia dibilang sebagai makhluk sosial, dalam hidupnya salin berbagi. Well, most of the living things on earth juga berbagi koq. Keq3x.... Tapi kalau manusia memang dalah hal berbagi memang lebih banyak sih, dari hal yang nyata sampai abstrak. Semandiri-mandirinya manusia, pasti mereka secara sadar atau tidak akan melakukan hal 'berbagi' dalam bentuk apapun itu, ke sekitarnya, di pergaulan, keluarga, dan lain-lainnya.

Sudah beberapa tahun belakangan ini, gw terbiasa untuk mandiri, walaupun gw selalu membiasakan diri untuk berbagi, and most of it to my family dan beberapa teman terdekat gw. Tapi kalau dibilang berbagi kepada seseorang yang dekat, seseorang yang gw sayangi dan mungkin gw cintai, agak sulit juga yah.

Pergaulan dan Optimisme

Kebanyakan dari hidup gw, yang membentuk gw adalah kebanyakan teman-teman gw.... Baik yang dekat maupun yang biasa saja. Entah mengapa, mulai SMP gw mulai menggantungkan hidup gw dengan kata-kata 'teman'. Tanpa 'teman', I'm nothing, useless, and left behind... Mulailah semenjak SMP itu gw berusaha untuk menyenangkan teman-teman saya, entah bagaimana caranya. SMP dan SMA..... peer pressure yang edyan! Keq3x.... :P Berteman dengan kelompok2 yang konon gw rasa istilahnya 'who's and whose'nya entah di SMP, SMA dan di kompleks...

Acap kali memang teman-teman yang berusaha menolong saya akhirnya menjauhkan diri dari gw. Cape dan malas mereka lama2, gw rasa waktu itu untuk berurusan dengan gw. Well, I never blamed them. Gw haus akan eksistensi koq waktu itu, sayangnya koq ke arah negatif... Eksistensi dan pengakuan publik. Hak3!!! Geblek.. Keluarga sempat menjadi no. 2.... 3..4...lalu menjadi urutan terakhir di hidup gw.. Namanya juga anak muda.. hak3!! Harusnya sih gak gitu juga sih.. :P Sempat menyesal, namanya juga manusia. :) Tapi akhirnya saat setelah dewasa, gw gak pernah menyesali hal itu, well, I was told to believe that there are many things in my life that meant to happen... dan juga hal-hal itu adalah untuk pembelajaran diri pastinya... :P